34 Comments

  1. I wouldn’t BUY one, but I WOULD make all of them ‘sing’, and then leave that aisle. Also, I’d be grateful I wasn’t working in that area of the store.

    PS. I still remember my father buying me a hula hoop . . . at a Newbery 5 & 10 cent store in our downtown, when downtowns were actually viable. So you can imagine how long ago THAT was!

  2. I have no idea who I would give this to. I can’t think of anyone I hate that much.
    P.S. I thought that the song line wasn’t quite right, but the second stanza of the Chipmunk’s “Christmas Song” does in fact have the word “still” in it.

  3. I think that’s a guy thing. I didn’t think of that at all, just felt really sad for the clerks who have to deal with all of that. I stay out of stores after Thanksgiving (and it’s getting earlier every year) because I can’t stand Christmas Musak.

  4. Oh, I definitely feel sorry for the clerks as well: my sons worked at a small neighborhood pharmacy (younger son inherited older son’s job when older son went off to college), and both of them were driven crazy by the same few songs playing in rotation between Thanksgiving and Christmas.

    Still, I would buy this horrible thing for my friend Kim in a heartbeat.

  5. Worse than this, sighted at Big Lots in the past: The little outhouse with Santa’s face and feet visible above and below the door. Sound effects and witty comments by Santa.

    Right now the shelves are full of tech-gimmicky horror props: phones with scary messages, books that tilt out of a shelf, mock film projectors, etc. Does anybody actually decorate the inside of their home for Halloween, except possibly for a party?

  6. I still wanna know why Dave wouldn’t let them sing the song again. It’s not that long of a song.

  7. Well if it was a teddy bear santa with the hula hoop and sold for less than US$5 husband would insist on buying it for my teddy village – trust me.

  8. I wouldn’t buy the Santa, even as a gag gift, but if we’re confessing secret sins, I *did* once buy a Billy Bass.

    (As a gag gift, yes, but even that cannot excuse my vileness. Sometimes I still wake up screaming.)

  9. One of my friends bought me a dancing fox that sings “What does the fox say” after I mad the mistake of commenting how much I disliked the song and didn’t want my kids to hear it and then start singing it endlessly. I do still talk to him, though. The toy has been hidden in the basement storage so the kids can’t find it.

  10. What is it about some people (myself strongly included) that makes us gift objects to someone who has stated his/her dislike of said object? My BFF, sadly passed away, loathed cows. Don’t know why; she just said it one day. And so for 30+ years, I gave her a cow ornament every Christmas, to the point where she had an entire tree of nothing but cow ornaments. However, she collected antique teapots and loved the loons on her summer cabin’s lake, so I gave her those ornaments, too, but she got to the point of actually looking forward to seeing what kind of cow ornament I would find for her every year. (Surprising how many there were!)

  11. No one I know would enjoy this. And I would never get a gift for anyone who I hated enough to inflict it on.

  12. When my kids were little, my brother invariably bought them toys that were either loud, destructive, or both.

    Coincidentally, I’m sure, he never planned on having children himself.

  13. “What is it about some people (myself strongly included) that makes us gift objects to someone who has stated his/her dislike of said object?”

    Because it’s FUNNY!

  14. On two or three occasions, we have either been happy that or have actually arranged to have certain gifts for our kids to come from other relatives or friends. In each case, we decided that it was ok for our kids to have the item in question, but we did not want to appear that we were encouraging it ourselves.
    P.S. @ Andréa – I do not remember who inflicted them upon us, but we have a set of three or four cow ornaments (that fit in nicely on our extremely eclectic tree). We also have (from my grandmother, R.I.P.) a set of three “Powerpuff Girl” ornaments, which I cherish very much.

  15. I bought a hamster wheel clock for my brother. It has a mechanical hamster in the wheel. Once every minute the hamster wakes up and runs the wheel through one revolution. The wheel is geared to a clock mechanism and the clock advances one minute. You can imagine how it clatters.

    I gave it to my brother, and suggested he put it in the guest bedroom.

  16. Andrea – worst of all, as of this year the Teddy Village is seasonal, instead of just for Christmas (extended previously to winter). We just had our first summer village layout and I am getting ready for the first fall one. We decided we need to get a “municipal building” of some type – village hall, school, combination of the two – if for no reason than there is a shortage of toilets in the village. The outhouse added last winter between the ski/sled mountain and the rental booth for same and the one in the honey store are the only two – and, of course, one has to buy something there to use the one in the honey store.

    Yes, we are this crazy – the village has been expanded the last two years from just the top of a trunk in the upstairs hall. Two years ago I added a small parsons table (plastic from when we first got married) and this year one of the shelves from a plastic set of shelves (you put the legs in each level and add the next) also from back then.

    It is such a famous village that a family of Koala bears (from Walmart) came for the summer to warm up from winter at their home.

  17. Also Andrea – I was talking about our excessive decorations for Christmas when we were at a meeting of our reenactment unit and one of the fellows commented something along the lines of “the Jewish girl does so much decorating?” (Girl, I am guessing I am 20 years older than him.) I thought about it. People who grew up with Christmas have traditions. My traditions was ever Christmas movie made.

    When the big tree had too many bear ornaments, I used the top of the old (artificial) tree that we were getting rid of became the first tree in the teddy village. When we had the bed bugs we bought and put up a small tree later that year – now it holds an assortment of the ornaments we made. Then we bought a tree at Ikea for the excessive number of Colonial Williamsburg brass ornaments we have received as members. There is also a beaded tree that I made (less than a foot tall) and one year a small office tree decorated with office supplies.

    Plus the pseudo colonial house decorations, embroidered decorations, and some figures that are about 3 feet tall – most from someone Robert worked, the tiny Cabbage Patch Kids’ stockings (you didn’t think it was just bears in the house) and some other figures around the living room. We don’t really buy gifts – maybe a book or DVD or two for Robert,so the decorating is the holiday.

  18. Bears are expected to take baths or showers – on their own – to remain clean, but I admit they rarely do. Heck, I don’t even dust the stuff that one should dust – my sister has been known to do the dreaded thing of writing her initials AND the date in the dust.

    It was not always like this. I used to clean and dust much more often, but since husband quit his job (he did not retire at 55 – as he says, he “quit my job as director of a children’s mental health center to switch careers to starving artist”. I would add “with a patroness” as I am still working – more when he quit work, less now. He actually quit do to horrible burnout from dealing with the dept of education and the dept of mental health both of which oversaw the agency – separately. One would come in and say “you must do X”. The other would then come in and say “why are doing X, you are not allowed to.

    Now cleaning is more casual. Just enough to keep the house healthy. The bears that get packed away get shaken off a bit before packing. The stuffed ones that are always out periodically get vacuumed. The ones on the shelves get dusted “once in a while”.

    Did I mention that my family used to call me Oscar Madison?

  19. No one on his/her deathbed says, “I wish I’d spent more time dusting and vacuuming.”
    We used to have a housecleaner, but getting ‘ready’ for her was more work than it was worth, so we (I) gave that up. Hubby vacuums and steamcleans floors because of the dogs; the rest of the house is cleaned just enough to ‘remain healthy’, as you say (I like that statement).

  20. “It was not always like this. I used to clean and dust much more often, but since husband quit his job”

    Shouldn’t he be doing the cleaning?

  21. Brian in STL – ha ha ha ha ha ha! No, house cleaning is 1 – Women’s work, 2 – icky and 3 – icky women’s work. Plus he gets dizzy and ill if he bends over.

  22. He never would have left home. He said that the laundry fairies did the laundry after he dropped it in a hole in the floor of the hall closet – and I am still not sure if he meant it or not.

    Mostly my problem is that he does not want to sit home and does not want to go anywhere without me – so the time I used to have for cleaning is wasted – my saying about this is “a day we don’t go to a Walmart, is a day we went to Micro Center, and often it both”. He doesn’t buy stuff – he just likes to walk around.

    Wednesday last week we had a scare and after 8.5 hours in the emergency room found out that he had not had a heart attack. Since then we have mostly been in the house as his shoulder and left arm are recovering from a horrible muscle pain. He has been out for lunch 4 times since and to the post office twice (both daily stops for us as we have lunch at Wendys daily and we have a PO Box). Yesterday (Wednesday) we went to Walmart and he had to walk out as the a/c made his arm hurt and then we walked into the supermarket next door (unrelated,we have small Walmarts) and had to walk out right away due to the a/c in same. So I have run out for quick errands (like covering checks we have to mail out) and mostly we have been home. I have gotten so much done in the week and a half I can’t believe it – our bathrooms have even been cleaned. Biggest problem with getting stuff done was the first 3 days he spent at the kitchen table blocking access to the bathroom there and to the basement.

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